Chapter 33: Swinging Steelyard

Dragon Era 850
「Wow! Hey, hey, Yuuki, did you see that just now!? A really huge kid was walking! And there was a really tiny kid, too!」
「Yeah... that was Ruful and Tia.」

Stroking Rin’s blue hair gently, Yuuka nodded.

「Even though they’re so different in size, they seem super close.」
「Yeah, those two have always been close.」
「But, you know... they looked very, very sad.」

Mm, Yuuka nodded again.

「They had another close friend. Lately, she’s not around anymore.」
「I seeee...」

Rin gazed up at Yuuka with innocent eyes and suddenly smiled, as if a good idea had struck her.

「Then I’ll go be their new friend!」

After widening her eyes a little in surprise, Yuuka smiled gently.

「Yeah... I’m sure both of them would be happy.」

She replied.

The first one Rin stopped being able to remember was Yuuka.
She forgot her face; the next day she forgot her name—and by the third day she had forgotten that she existed.

Even when told she was Yutaka and Light Blue’s daughter, she would tilt her head and ask, “What do you mean?”

It didn’t take long for that question to change into, “Who are Yutaka and Light Blue?”

And today, she finally forgot Ruful and Tia as well.
Despite how conspicuous the two of them are, she was all excited as if seeing both a giant and a pixie for the first time.

Whose words were they, that a person’s heart is formed by memory and experience? In her case, that was completely off the mark.

No matter how many memories she lost, no matter what she could no longer recall, just as water remains water no matter the vessel that holds it, Rin was Rin, through and through.

For us that was both a joy and a deep sorrow.

「Hey hey, Yuuki, have you seen Sig?」

Having forgotten Yuuka, Rin apparently thinks she’s Yuuki.
Honestly, when they were children maybe—but now I don’t think they resemble each other that much; perhaps she’s sensing some kind of unconscious connection.

「If you mean Sig, he married Honoo-san and went back to the lizardmen village, remember?」

Yuuka, ever kindly, went along with it and acted as Yuuki. Somehow, no matter who she’d heard it from, she even matched without a hitch the stories Rin brought up about their exchange‑student days. There were moments I almost mistook her for the real Yuuki myself.

At Yuuka’s reply, Rin stared back at her with eyes like glass beads. Even from behind I could see Yuuka’s expression stiffen and her shoulders hunch.

「...Ah, right. That’s how it was.」

When Rin answered with a soft expression, Yuuka and I both let out a sigh of relief.
It isn’t only the old things Rin forgets. She’ll forget we had this exchange today and ask the same thing again tomorrow.

However, that doesn’t mean even her reaction will be the same.

『Who is Honoo-san?』

Before long, Rin will ask that.
I’ve grown used to being asked the same thing every day.
But being made to realize, in that instant, that yet another person had vanished from inside her... No matter how many times, I didn’t think I could ever get used to that.

「Hey, Sensei. Did you and Yuuki have a fight?」

One day, Rin asked while slumped over a desk with both arms for a pillow, her tail swaying back and forth.

「A fight? We didn’t. Why?」
「Because it kind of feels cold between you two.」
「Does it? We’re normal.」
「Nooo way.」

The little girl puffed out her cheeks in displeasure.

「You finally, finally just became husband and wife.」

Ah... so that’s where she is now. Nostalgia made me narrow my eyes without thinking.

「Well, the bond between husband and wife is something outsiders can’t really measure.」

How were Yuuki and I, I wonder. I remember clearly what we talked about and what we did, but if asked how it looked to others, I’m not confident at all.

「You know...」

My answer must not have pleased her; Rin stuck out her lips in a pout.

「Sensei, you’re not cheating, right?」

I couldn’t help but laugh at that.
I see. She’s a girl too, I realized—belatedly.

「Do you really think I have that kind of wherewithal?」
「...Surprisingly?」

At the earnest little tilt of her head, I laughed again.

「Hey, Yuu...」

Another day. As always, Rin called out brightly, and then her voice stopped dead.

「No... not Yuuki. Yuuka.」

Her murmur was heavy and low. Covering her face with both hands, Rin slowly shook her head.

「Sorry, Yuuka, I...」
「It’s okay.」

It seems memory doesn’t simply disappear.
There were times when Rin, like this, came back to herself.
But that may not have been something to rejoice over. If anything, it may have been painful.

「Yuuka... Yuuka. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I...」

For us... and for Rin as well.

「Yuuka... Light Blue, Yutaka, Ruful, Tia.」

As if retracing the memories she had lost.

「Violet. Luka. Sig. Yuuki. Nina‑sensei... Sensei.」

As if to hold on to them desperately, she wrote the names down.
Even so, those memories fell away, piece by piece.

「...Hey, Sensei, I can’t find Sig anywhere. Do you know where he went?」

Day by day, while slipping back and forth between little girl and adult, Rin kept traveling further and further back through time.


* * *


And it happened on a perfectly tranquil spring afternoon.

「Hey, Sensei. Can I ask you for something awful?」

The moment I looked into her eyes, I realized Rin had recovered her adult heart.
Of course, it would only be for a short while.

「Of course.」

So I nodded without hesitation.

「You know... I... I’m going to forget you, Sensei. And everyone. I’m going to forget everything, everything.」
「...Ah.」

Inside Rin... Yuuki was no more.
Luka, too. Violet‑san. Sig. Nina.

「But... but. But, Sensei—Sensei alone... I want you not to forget me.」
「As if I’d ever forget.」
「...Good.」

When I nodded firmly, Rin’s expression relaxed and she let out a long breath.

「...May I make one awful request too?」

I had a premonition. That’s why, uncharacteristically, I said such a thing.

「Mm. Okay. What is it?」
「Close your eyes.」
「Hm?」

Looking puzzled but doing as she was told, Rin closed her eyes.
Might she never open them again, just like this?
Or when she opened them, would she have forgotten everything?
Holding such fears... I nevertheless brought my face close and kissed her.

Rin’s eyes snapped open, and she stared at me with those glass‑bead eyes.

「...Th‑that’s really awful!」

But that lasted only an instant—she immediately went bright red and shouted.

「Why would you do something like that!?」
「Because you wouldn’t, and you’d never say anything, right?」

When I said it with a teasing air, Rin dropped her gaze and fell silent.

「Or... have you even forgotten that feeling?」

Rin shook her head, trembling.

「...You noticed?」
「How could you think I wouldn’t?」
「Because... it’s you, Sensei.」

I found that highly regrettable.
...Well, I do think I’m on the dense side. I’ll grant you that.
But no matter what, I’m not such a fool as to believe the lie that you’d go that far—risking your whole body—just to repay a favor.

...At least to the extent that I can recognize that the reason I lost it enough to think, for the first time in my life, that it would be fine to kill someone, wasn’t something as simple as not wanting to lose just a student.

「...Since when did Sensei become so unfair?」
「Unfair, am I?」
「You are.」

If Rin says so, maybe so.

「Because... if you do something like this, it makes me not want to... forget...」

Tears as beautiful as pearls spilled drop by drop from Rin’s eyes.

「I won’t forget. Not ever.」
「...Right.」

Wiping them away, I swore it. Perhaps I am unfair, but Rin—who never said anything, never even tried to make me notice—was plenty unfair too.
Then the scales should balance.

「...In that case, fine. Not really fine, but... fine.」

With a face that was both crying and smiling, Rin said that.


* * *


I had a premonition.
The next morning, I learned I’d been right.

「Hello, nice to meet you!」

As soon as she noticed me, she smiled and greeted me like that.

「Hello.」

I returned her greeting. The layers on the waist fin of her body lying on the bed numbered eight.
It was Rin as she was before she met me. Magic springs from wishes, so this was only natural.

She lost everything, and gained everything.
The scales are balanced; her memories will likely fade no further.
At the same time, she will never remember us again.

Nor, surely, will she feel the same way again. But that’s fine.
I found I could accept that, naturally.

「Hey, can I ask a weird question?」
「What is it?」

Despite it being our first meeting, the little girl didn’t flinch in the least and stared straight at my face.

「Why are you so red?」
「...Does the color red scare you?」
「Nope.」

Rin shook her head and smiled.

「It’s like the evening sun—so very pretty.」